I was having sex the other day with Juju, and started farting during the old in-and-out. It was annoying, but she is very understanding and let me finish before laughing like a 5 year old walking in on their parents, well, doing it.
She got dressed and left. Awkward is an understatement.
After sex I always like to have sexy time with myself in the shower. I masturbate after sex so that I feel one step closer to a threesome. I was in the process, in the shower, when I started farting. It didnt stop the whole time I was in the shower. As soon as I had sprayed my seed all over the shower and the shower curtain I stopped farting.
The next morning when I logged onto Porn Hub and started my mid-morning tug, I again started farting. I waited five more hours to see if it was a fluke...this time I logged onto Xtube, same thing. I started farting while masturbating. I was fucking confused as to what to do. I decided to call my doctor and arrange an appointment.
I went in and he made me strip down to my boxers, then he left me in the room for 10 minutes. I surfed porn on my iPhone while waiting for him...I let out a little toot. I told him that when he came back in.
He shook his head, and sent me out without having to pay. I was stepping on to the elevator, with three little old ladies, when he sneaked in.
"AW" he said, out of breath.
"Listen your to relaxed while having sex or masturbating, tense up. Look at it as a job. That is why I think you are gassy during any type of orgasim. Try it for a week, if it doesnt work then call me."
"Thank you doc."
"I'm billing you for this by the way." he said, as he exited the elevator.
I looked over at the three old ladies.
"He is a great doctor. I was farting while sex or masturbation. I hope his advice works." I waved to the three old ladies as they got off on the next floor.