the ringing is constant as it is loud, i wake up and look around. i am laying in broken glass which crunches under my back as i move to sit up, an AK laying by my side. 'what the fuck is this shit' i say to myself aloud. around me worried bank workers are crouching down with their hands over their heads. i grab the AK and get to my feet, the frightened eyes watch me rise. i look around and see the same story, frightened eyes on frightened bodies. they try to shrink as small as possible as my eyes track over them. 'nobody fucking move' i shout, my voice betraying my confusion. i need to fix that: 'you fuckin cunts'. yeah that should do it, i am back in charge of whatever this shit is.

loud speakers carry a voice into the bank 'this is the police, we have the building surrounded, we just want a peaceful solution here' its johnson, that prick. how the hell do i know that? this shit is totally messed up. i shout back 'ok, johnson no fucking heroics. im coming out with the hostages, no guns pointing at me or i start blasting, you got that champ?' ha, that will sort him out, fucking public school boy coppa. greener than wembley stadium but sergeant already, now thats more fucked up than all this shit. 'ok, nice and slow. my men will stand down' shouts johnson, yeah right. but here we go. 'everybody up, move here' the bankers look at me like lost fucking sheep. 'move the fuck here' i shout, my voice trailing off to a hiss. i am loving this. i might be in a world of shit but this is greatest fun i have ever had.

i crouch amongst my little herd of hostages as we move towards the wall of glass doors. the bright sunshine meeting us, i wait until my eyes become accustomed to the light, peering into the day. police cars surround the entrance, guns pointing down. 'ok pigs, be cool, i dont want no fucking tough guys messing this shit up'. my little gang move down the steps towards the gap in the cars. the sheep move slowly, scared of the armed cops just as much as me. i push the nearest one who trips and knocks another down the stairs. 'oh shit'. the others start to bolt in every direct, gas canisters fall by my feet. ive seen this enough times to know that i am dead. 'fuck it' i slip the safety and fire into the parting bankers who disappear into the smoke, my bullets chase them down like angry tax inspectors. i duck and move so they cant get a fix on me, firing volleys into the direction of the parting bank hostages. 'fuck this' i ran back into the bank but the bullets tear into my back, i land on my stomach, my back a blanket of red. i dont feel any pain as the coppers swarm around me. one young pretty female officer kicks away my gun. 'your a pretty one, bet i could make you squeal' i say smiling a "fuck you" to the cops. 'sorry what did you say sarge?' ...sarge? ..what the?... oh yeah.. johnson helped me up and was back onto his megaphone 'good exercise everybody, well done, hope you all have a good weekend' i start to remember something about a practice hostage exercise planned for this afternoon. wow. fucking awesome, 'same again next friday everyone?' with a big smile, i wink at the young officer. 'fancy a pint?'