I was going to make the title of this fuzzy memories but that sounds like date rape.
Pot stories are always funny but this one was just weird.
I just got home from work and I started to roll me up a stogy.I was living by myself and ramen was my favorite food. I put the top
ramen to boil and stepped outside onto my back patio to indulge a little. One thing
lead to another and I ended up smoking the entire blunt to myself after I was
done I walk inside to a smoke filled room and I wonder if the smoke some how
ended up going inside the house, then it struck me, holy crap I forgot about
the ramen.. I know, I know who the fuck screws up top ramen this guy did. My pot
was completely chard my house filled with the smell of burnt ramen and all I could
think about was who the fuck screws up top ramen its fucking ramen just add
water!! I began to laugh hysterically then my phone rang I dashed across the
house to pick it up. Here is when I knew I was on a good one, on the other end
of the line this feeble old voice yells out Jim, Jim I need oxygen can I borrow yours I answer im not Jim you have the wrong number this old lady turns into
the nastiest hag on earth and replies listen here you little shit I know you're
jim now fucking give me your oxygen in a panic I reply how do I give you
oxygen over the phone she replies don't play stupid you little shit just give
me the oxygen you dumb mother fucker that's when I told her OK, im not Jim and
you really have the wrong number this old hag says well then Jim you can go
fuck yourself she hangs up. Im still on the phone and now without me setting
the receiver down the phone begins to ring as if I placed a call. The line is
picked up by a voice mail machine saying sorry this is the office of Kathy
please leave a message; then some lady picks up and I say hello I assume its
Kathy, she replies why didn't you help her out and give her your oxygen that's
when I realized this is fucking crazy I hang up the phone and get on my
computer and load up counter-strike.
I don't know if this was one of those weird
beyond belief stories or I was a victim of some weird phone prank.
Moral of the story is don't forget to turn off the stove if you're going to get wasted! Or some stranger then fiction shit might happen to you!