Danzig's in Idaho

Danzig wrote a blog earlier about moving to Idaho from Montanna. That's like leaving a job at Wendy's to work at The Olive Garden. It's a step up but...MAN!

I was born and raised in the Seattle area where life is good, we recycle, vote Democrat, and never talk bad about a minority (while he is within earshot).

An ex GF of mine was a Morman from Utah, then Pocatello Idaho, before moving to my area. We took a trip to Idaho to see her Mom in the early 90's.

The first lesson I learned was that there was NO ESPRESSO east of the Cascades. I was from Seattle and just assumed every town was as addicted to high-octane java as were we. In the early 90's a mocha in eastern Washington was harder to get than original content on eBaum's world.

In Pocatello we went to the mall. It was not as glamorous as the malls in Seattle. The sign, I shit you not, was a piece of piece of plywood with the words, "Pocatello Mall" painted on it. I think the back probably said, "Huge Yard SALE."

Pocatello is not far from the Utah border and the mall had a store that sold Garmets. Garmets are the special, super-secret underwear that Mormans wear after they go through Temple. It keeps their sinful clothes from touching their anointed bodies. My GF hadn't gone through temple and didn't even know what was involved as the Mormon faith has a lot of mystery, secret handshakes, passwords, voodoo dances, unspoken rituals, and needlepoint.

I also met her father for the first and only time. He was an Elder in the Church of LDS. He was a big guy with rediculuous mutton-chop sideburns who, when introduced to me, put his arm around my shoulder/neck and said in a quiet menacing voice, "Take care of my daughter; Seattle's not that far away." No joke!

His concern for his daughter would have been moving had I not known that he routinly, humiliated her and her mom for years, punched her in the face from her earliest momories, and molested her and her sisters. One of her pupils was always bigger than the other. I'm guessing that repeated blows to the head did that. Just a guess.

I've also been to similarly "interesting" places such as North and South Daota and Montana. Foture blog fodder perhaps?

Danzig, I hope life is good in the "Big 'Ho." I'd sure build a fort with you. If you get to Coeur d'Alene say hi to Mark Fuhrman for me. I bet the 12 black Idaho residents don't venture THERE...

Uploaded 12/06/2008
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