Death and Taxes

I have a big problem with taxes that has been weighing heavily on my mind and is causing me physical manifestations like head aches, nausea, depression and even thinking about how killing myself would feel, "Oh so good".  But don't worry, I only entertain that idea because I have an open mind and recall how others who have had similar problems took their lives. I won't be doing that and will continue to fight for my home and family, but it's hard to keep my composure especially in light of knowing other contractors like me, have lost everything under similar circumstances. 

 In the process, I have closed my business account. And thank God I did, because the provincial Liberal government has imposed a 9.8% tax on gross income to shore up Workman's Compensation. Now, I'm self employed and no longer have employees. I have private insurance that is a lot cheaper and covers me 24/7. Workman's Comp is only good while I'm working and five times the price. To top it off, there are, "No accidents" so if I make a claim, I am fined for unsafe work practices which offsets any claim. So now all my work is for friends and family, for which I shall never run out. Yes, I'm that good!

After I go through the wringer for tax assessments, second and third mortgages, the government, "Promises" to audit me. This will be the final battle, to which if history is any indication, I will lose everything. But I'll put up a fight, hopefully securing my home and mortgaging my being until sweet death takes me away. This is now the fate of a dying breed of entrepreneur, riddled with taxes and regulations that has put a stranglehold on small business. 

However, my fate is much better than a wonderful couple, recently retired, with a government pension for life, both diagnosed with inoperable cancers and very little chance of survival. They have five children and three grandchildren. The father, for many years has visited prisoners around the province on his own time and dime to bend his ear and take the time to listen and help young men who screwed up. Like who does that? Pretty compassionate stuff.

Anyhow, it fucks me up, because I don't know if I should be grateful  I don't have his problems or thankful, regardless of my tax burden, I can still offer him and his wife some help, if ever they so should need it and they will. I guess it's, " Just be glad the cards you are dealt and deal with them, because someone else is bound to have a worse hand".


Uploaded 02/20/2013
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