We were somewhere outside of Barstow when the dick pills kicked in.  I knew I had to get to The Mint before 6:00 PM.  It was going to be close.  I pushed the throttle down hard, as my passenger puked Early Times down the side of the great red shark.  He was a bastard of a man.  He was 6'1" and 240 pounds...hardly any fat on him.  He was strong as an ape and he smelled like one.  I pelted him with empty beer cans.  It didn't faze him.  So I picked up a full one.  Just as I threw it, he turned my direction.  The can of Falls City hit him square in the nose.  The blood spurted out like Kennedy getting shot.  It was horrific and I laughed like a fag getting his nuts tickled.  The beast must not have been as drunk as I thought because he wailed in pain and began swinging at me. 

I pushed down on the brakes with both feet.  The shark skidded violently to a halt.  The beast lurched forward and hit his nose on the dash.  I laughed some more.  Then the big fuck started swinging at me.  I tried to jump out of the shark and get away from his meaty fists.  The goddamn dick pills had my junk turgid as a steel rod.  I had to withstand the blows.  I finally calmed him down with some more whiskey.  I inhaled a few lines of coke, a mask full of nitrous, and some more dick pills...we were back on the run. 

The sun was hot as hell and the beer was dehydrating me.  The beast appeared to be passed out.  So I whipped into a choke and puke for some iced tea.  The people in there looked at me like I was a rabid animal.  I went to the bathroom to see what the fuck they were looking at.  "Holy Jesus!" I exclaimed when I got a glimpse of myself.  I was sweating profusely, my top and bottom lip were busted and swollen from the beast, and my raging hard on was pushing hard against the terry cloth shorts I was wearing.  The paranoia set in.  I thought to myself, "These country bumpkins are going to call the law on me.  If they find me, that beast, and the drug filled shark there will be a shootout unlike any other.  Many would die...I can't have this on my conscience."  I thought quickly.  My brain was racing.  I broke out the bathroom window and made my escape.  Crawling through that small window with an erection was painful to say the least.  "Goddamn dick pills!" 

I jumped in the shark and floored the pedal.  I wound up going back towards California for second.  I power braked it, spun the wheel hard to the left, and floored it again.  The beast nearly fell out on the concrete.  I pulled him back in and grabbed another beer in one motion.  He muttered some nonsense and I flicked his broken nose.  He wailed and I laughed.  This was going to be a fun weekend...