Have You Done Enough To Be Heaven Worthy?

I'm not real informative on religion, not a great blogger, but here we go.

If everyone truly believed god was real there would be no hate right? Everyone  would give their fair share of everything to everyone?. People who had less? Would you take care of the elderly? No medicare no problem! Come on in and get what you need old man/woman we are a loving people  Jeebus would've wanted it that way. Homeless bum alcoholic? Let's get you the all the help you need, if you screw up, we'll help you again. Hell, just give him booze, keep him happy,. Wasn't there alcohol in the bible? How many cars and houses do I need anyways, Jeebus wasn't selfish and he supposedly performed miracles. I got a 1980 Pinto I don't need anymore, take it. Don't talk about there isn't enough to go around, jeebus would be pissed about that. There's plenty, the debt doesn't mean a thing the great Dick Cheney said one time. Seriously, if jebbus was real, wouldn't he have wanted everyone to have everything equally?  Also, why all the  suffering?  Cancer, heart attacks, kidnappings, rapes, murders, where was Jeebus? Oh that would be satan's fault. For some reason satan can take control over the jeebs and make bad things happen in this world. As proved on the great show South Park satan can kick the crap out of jeebus. So sad.

Ok, let's get real for pretend here. Say a message came down to NASA from jeebus that said he's coming to visit us sept 1 and gives us a grade. He said you will be judged on past performances,  but you have some time to change who you are until he gets here.  What defines you as heaven worthy? What do you need to change before the Jeebs gets here? How would you make out with the 10 commandments? Need to know if you were perfect and lived by his laws. Were you giving, not selfish in any way whatsoever, stay with one woman, no masturbation? Who  are you and what makes you think you should go to heaven?

I already decided on another post that I want Al Pacino as my satan, sex and cocaine couldn't be a better eternal fate for me. Enjoy flying around with your white wings in your white clouds.Seriously though, you've all done more than enough to be able to join me down there. Don't fret, if you like Black Sabbath we'll be jamming for eternity.
Uploaded 08/17/2012
  • 0 Favorites
  • Flag
  • Stumble
  • Pin It