Quotes from the genius himself:
Bart, you're saying butt-kisser like it's a bad thing!
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
But Marge, it's uter-US, not uter-YOU!
Did you know that in Massachusetts it's legal to marry your son?
D'oh! Nuts. Mmmm... donuts.
Don't hassle the dead, boy. They have eerie powers.
Everyone knows I'm what makes this town great!
First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.
(drunk) Guess how many boobs I saw today? Fifteen!
(talking about a private eye) How ironic. Now he's blind after a life of being able to see.
I bet Einstein turned himself all sorts of colors before he invented the light bulb.
I don't have to be careful, I got a gun!
I have three kids and no money. Why can't I have no kids and three money?
(upon witnessing a meteor shower) I wish God was alive to see this.
If God didn't want us to eat in church, he would've made gluttony a sin.
Just like the bible says: Screw that!
Operator, get me Thailand. T, I... and so on.