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IT DOESN'T GET EASIER WITH TIME is ALL A KIND LIE!


Dedicated to my HEAVEN aka my man ;-) 
someone once asked me do u know where heaven is? I smiled and said softly .. In his arms ;-)

WHY IS ALL A KIND LIE :
Is a lie what pple say that the pain of missing you gets easier with time..I still cry every night b4 I go to bed the same tears I cried the night when you left 

I miss you so much my love ;,(
I wanna be able 2 sleep again like b4. ;( because I knew that while I was sleeping you were  taking care of my soul

Here is an example of  a Kind lie --> Luna .,trust me things will get better and will hurt less with time.. 
REALLY : / ? 
because I feel since he left like if I have 24/7 a hand pressing on my chest and makes it difficult to breath :( .. 
the only times I can breath like b4 are when he calls ., I actually feel like someone is opening my chest and caresing my soul ..

I miss my good friends but I have no desire to leave my house cuz even driving reminds me he was there w/ me .the laughs we shared ..even the silly fights :) lol. 
It's like when he left he tooked with him half of me the woman half :( and the only thing left in me is the mother - auntie half .

because the only ones I wanna be around and actually are able to ease the pain in my heart,.are ( my son and baby nephew  :) .I have to keep taking them out to bowling., movies., library ,parks daytime stuff ;). 
And the silly internet videos.,pictures, movies.help me to occupied my mind in the meantime when I'm alone in the room .. specially every 2 weekends weekends that my son leaves w his dad and my nephew is w/ his parents :'( .. 

I feel bad cuz my good friends miss me too ., but I don't feel like being around anyone at the moment I'm the worst company now .cuz the only thing in my mind  is my LOVE what he's doing? how's he feeling? is he ok? ;,(I'm afraid what if at any second I might burst into tears anywhere because I miss him so much and end up ruining  everyone's night :( ..

That's why  I rather stay in my house ., my room and deal w/  it on my own terms :)posting silly stuff here and there making pple laugh a lil .. makes up my day :) .







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