Some commercials are alright, and I do admitt I love the commercials that play during the Super Bowl, more so than the Super Bowl... But there are commercials that I despise...
1. Always Pads... Besides the vulgar depictions that we can all go without, like the tornados, and blue liquid, they have to end their commercials with "Have a Happy Period... Always..." First off... if I was "Always" bleeding... I would call a doctor... and if it was Alway's fault.. I would sue the pants and disposable pads off these people. Second of all; nothing is Happy about periods... ever. Who the fuck ever thought that wearing a part of a diaper for a week would be a happy experience? These people have obviously never experienced a menstral cramp in their life.... So unless they start lacing these things with trace amounts of LSD, they have no right to tell me how my rag should be.
2. Insurance commercials... "When you switch you can save hundreds of dollars a year..." They ALL say that! I'm confused... Who's the cheapest if they are all cheaper than the other? Where the hell do they get these numbers? I guess it doesn't matter... as soon as you make a claim they'll be more expensive than anyone, if of course they file it.
3. Commercials for spacific episodes of shows... They show you everything that goes on that is of any interest. When you go to watch the show, you know what's going to happen, but even then they drag it on with suspence and predictable commercial breaks like it's news or something. Often you'll find that the unanswered questions, when answered, turns out to be a total waste your time and anticipation.
4. Any commercial with William Shatner in it... How old is this fuck? When will he die? The only fucking thing he has going for him is the way he spoke in Star Trek. And that's all he ever did. Star Trek. No movies, no other shows... that's it. He milks that shit dryer than an Etheopian cow.... still... to this day! I'm sure that he can live on what he made on Star Trek, but no he's gotta do commercials.
5. Activia Commercials... Eat yogurt for 14 days, and you turn into a partial belly dancer... Wrong.. it helps you shit on a regular basis. That's all. There are plenty of things that do that, but in a shorter amount of time. Chili, Tacos, anything mexican or east indian..... STOP EATING CHEESE!
6. Glade Air Freshners... Ok, to my understanding, this bitch buys a new candle everyday and invites all of her 3 friends over to smell her house. What I really don't get is why she always whispers "And yes, it's Glade" like she doesn't want her friends to find out. Which is cool and all, except in the first commercial, she had her friends coming over so she peeled the lable off the candle, went to throw it out, only for it to stick on her ass. When her friends came over, they discovered the sticker and the lady is all embarrassed... I don't get why she whispers if the whole reason her friends are over is because she wants them to catch a whiff. I can see this buldging eye'd bitch in a dark room masturbating with a scented candle "OH Glade!!! Yeah that's right, it's glade... oh yeah!"
7. Old Navy Manicans... This is all around stupid. These people have no sense of humor. The jokes, metaphores, and overall "plot" of these series of commercials make no sense what so ever. Here's an example. In one of the commercials the blonde girl manican says to her asian manican friend and says that she wants new jeans. Her friend says "Well Old Navy has these jeans for $29.99" and she's like "no, I mean I think I might want new jeans"... her friend gasps and then her manican boyfriend shows up and she tells him and he is also shocked.... The metaphore here is supposed to be comparing new jeans to a new man... despite how stupid this is, they go on in their next commercial treating this blonde manican as a celebrity and the new tabliod asks "does this bitch have a new man?" like it was funny or something. Horrible commercials... even if they had real people in it.
**** more to come ****