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Terms used by Deli Clerks

  1. Müclet(s) (mYOO-clit/s):  Any lower-class person who thinks they are of a higher-class and make poor financial decisions when pertaining to food.
  2. Sub-Slug(s):  Any person, typically with a group, who attempt to buy a sandwich 5-10 minutes before the store's closing, 4-5 times per week.  
  3. Schmuck(s):  Any person with the personality of the skin leftover from circumcision, similar to that of a "Douchebag."
  4. M.I.L.E:  Derived from the term "M.I.L.F.," but meaning "Momma I'd Like to Explore" both sexually AND financially...
  5. Subdivision Bitch(es):  (S.B.D.)  Any woman attempting to dress like a teenager who lives in a Subdivision housing area.  Typically, SBD's do Pilates, eat Tofu, drink Orange-Pomegranate Tea, and display their views with bumper stickers on their over-sized SUV's and Vans with 2 TV displays in the rear to silence their Adderall-driven children...
  6. Radiator Hose Fan Club Members (RHFC Members):  White girls, typically trashy white girls, who date black guys.  The "Radiator Hose" being the black guy's penis.  Although it may be long, it only becomes semi-rigid when fully erect.
  7. Flug:  Any person that takes more than what's offered to them, typically fat and ugly with yellow armpit stains...
  8. Connoisseur:  Any person who inspects, smells, and tastes all meats/cheeses before allowing the Clerk to continue slicing the desired products.  Typically, these people are senile, older women missing 10 or more teeth and are taller than 5'10"...  (Note: Connoisseurs ALWAYS buy 8 or more items, each at a 1/4 pound, sliced paper thin, separated by plastic sheets.)
  9. Defectives:  A pair of people, always a mother and her retarded child.  These people are very particular on how their products are prepared and will tell you when something appears "off."  The mother is always loud and obnoxious, while the child is usually between the ages of 12-22 with an actual mental impairment.
  10. Overweight Jellybean(s):  Fat women who wear tight, spandex-like clothingwith bright colors and patterns.  Also known as "Big Heavy's."
  11. Mud Flaps:  Any pair of Tits that sag below the elbows.  Typically "Mud Flaps" are leathery, wrinkled, mole-covered, and or ashy.
  12. LeRoy:  Any African-American women with thick facial hair.
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