Once upon a time I was having a guys night out.  Not like all those "guys night in" that I have on those lonely Saturday nights. Up yours Spike TV.  I was with my friend Ricky going bar hopping.  We would generally stay at one bar.  Preferable one where everybody knows our name or at least a bar that can serve some chocolate milk. Is that to much to ask?  As we were walking to our next bar we accidentally tripped and fell into a strip club.   In a Canadian strip club during the winter months the strippers come out naked and put their clothes on because it is so cold.  Since me and my friend were already inside we decided to stay.  I always thought if I were to ever step into a strip club I would be all like. "WOOOO BOOBIES, BOOBIES, BOOIES!" But no five minutes in and I was like "Oh your naked. That's nice. What else is there to do here?"  Instead me and my friend just talked and talked and talked and became stronger friends then ever before.  That's when it happened.  A stripper came out and started dancing to the theme song from Ghostbusters.  In an instant second my friend and I became the biggest perverts in the whole club.  We were hooting and hollering louder than an audience member of a FOX TV show.  True story I swear.  A stripper came up to me and asked if I would like a dance. I said sure. So I asked the DJ to play Rightious Brothers - Unchained Melody. We slow dance for the whole song It was romantic but it wasn't what the stripper had in mind.  Turns out she meant lap dance. $20 a dance!  This was when I pulled out a quarter and said.  "Tails we dance, heads YOU DIE!"  This was when the bouncer told us to leave.  So Ricky and I got up put on our jackets. Before we left I kissed my mom goodbye and told her I'll be home soon to finish my homework.