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Why Chicks Suck

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Here is a brief bit of crap about why chicks suck. It is in response to straightjacket's estrogen version.

*They don't understand that it is not only normal for men to be attracted to strange, it is in our DNA. We look at, lust over, and jack off to women who aren't you. It doesn't mean we love you less. Don't be so insecure.

*They have a mental web browser of every time we did some jackass thing and do not hesitate to double-click on any transgression from the past. In her mind, my getting toast crumbs in the margarine is somehow linked to the time she found the text from my ex on my phone.

*They have a need to define relationships. It is not goosd enough that you both dig eachother and are spending all of your free time together. They ask, "What ARE we?" They have to nail us down to a definition like a lawyer with a contract. They can't just let the relationship be what-it-is so it can be what-it-will-become. They need to define so they can add it to their browser when we act in a way that is outside of this definition.

*They gotta' have knick-nacks. Little figurines, decorative wall hangings, any purposeless piece of crap that "Looks cute." I just need my neon Corona Beer sign in the recroom and I'm happy.

*They bitch about equal pay for equal work yet I have been pulled away from my task in the workplace to put a new bottle on the water cooler or go upstairs and get a box of invoices because they "..are so heavy."  Also, I have seen women get upset and cry at work...  MANY TIMES at different companies. I've seen them have to leave for a while to stew. I see them be catty.

That is why women suck.

I've also had them comfort me when I am upset. I've been surprised with little gifts for no reason. I've seen the sparkling eyes and blushing cheeks of a cutie who thinks that I am the most hansome guy in the world. There is nothing more beautiful than the curves of a nude woman. The smell of a girlfriend comforts and calms.

I love women and they bug the hell out of me. Men and women are different. MEN... AND WOMEN...ARE DIFFERENT. Just different...

 

ugdork Uploaded 11/09/2008
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