It was December 16, 1991 and I get a call from my friend Rodney who was once again thinking about killing himself, I told him I was on my way and it was a short 30 minutes away and we can sort this crap out. I dont mind say that I was feeling a little used about this stuff"for Christ's sake where is his family". A little short background on Rodney.... When Rod was a small child his father used him for a punching bag and put him in the hospital a couple times but Rod's mom who loved him dearly got rid of that dad and brought in another Father of the year and this was a hell of a nice guy. He had only one problem when he drank he liked to come into Rod bedroom at night and show Rod another type of hell and Rod? Well he just got quieter and different as you could well imagine. When Rod turned 17 with his mom's permission he joined and served two tours of duty in Vietnam and as he used to like to say "you get a real chance to exercise some demons over there". I met Rod when I was 20 and he was around 30 and we hit it off right away because we both loved and made love to Wild Turkey 101. Rod pretty much became a staple in my life and stood up for me in my second marriage and would have probably have went on the honeymoon if not for my wife. lol Rod had a couple of quirks like shooting his shotgun off in his house and I had to bail him out of jail a few times because no matter what he did he couldn't get rid of them demons. We often talked of God and how he wanted to believe and my only response to him was "if I was God it would not have happened but as you can see I am not". Back to December 1991 I go to his door and knock and no answer so I got my key out and let myself in and there sitting in his favorite chair was Rod with his face gone or most of it and and his shotgun at his feet, he was breathing and talking to me and his last word were please finish what I started. I could go on with the description of the face but lets just say I lost my friend a couple minute later and very few questions from the cops when they came. I hear all the different views on suicide and you are all entitled to them but as for me when I looked into the face of it or rather part of the face of it I just know you have to be pretty sick to do this. Rod told me stories of war and I feel both glad he could share and sad that I know what our young men and women have to do for our freedoms. I remember two things about his funeral, he was buried in his blues and I walked up to the casket and took out my knife and cut one of the gold buttons off and if you meet me today you will see it on a choker I wear. The second thing was at the grave site when I was standing there and my wife reached around and grabbed me and said " this is another name that belongs on the wall" I love her today for that statement. There are 8 of us who meet up the weekend before Thanksgiving to do a "My God I cant believe I drank that much" weekend for Rodney and all I can say is "I cant believe I drank that much this weekend" lol I know this was long and I hope you enjoyed reading some non-fiction for a change and thanks for reading Bohank