When did I get so old?
I have to wonder when it first hit? Was it the day that I decided to stop smoking pot and start looking for a real life? I remember thinking that I would never see thirty because partying was everything. I remember telling people I would never settle down. Look at me now, punching the clock for another eight so I can earn enough money to put gas in the car so I can make it back to work. Ironic, I never saw myself turning 60 hour weeks to pay a house payment, or put food on the table. I definately never would have thought that I would have three people at home depending on me to do the same.
And exactly when did I begin to listen to politics? I never cared who ran the country or any of the issues on the board before. When was the first time I began to bitch about how much I am paying in taxes? When did I actually begin to care what school district I lived in? When did I start telling my children no without even listening to what they were asking? When exactly did I become my parents?
When did it become more enjoyable to sit on the back porch and have a beer than it was to go to the clubs for a night out? And when the hell was it that I started to get so tired all the time? It's hard to figure out at exactly what point in my life my six pack abs turned into a pony keg.
When did I stop thinking farting noises were funny? Oh wait, I still do. But when was it that I lost touch with all my friends and stopped hanging out all the time? When did I start to ask what kind of health insurance came with any potential jobs? What was I thinking the first time I ever said, "Stop that, or I will give you something to cry about?"
When did I stop living on Ramen noodles, or worrying about how I would keep the lights on? I think that was about the same time. It was also then that I realized that there is nothing in life more enjoyable than having your own flesh and blood in the form of a child sit on your lap and say, "I love you daddy!" I guess a beer on the porch is a good thing when you watch your children playing. I guess losing touch with your friends is second nature when you meet that one person who you want to spend every day with.
60 hour work weeks are no fun, but then again, it's nice driving a car that isn't on its last leg. Now I have gotten to the point that I don't wonder when I got old, I wonder how my kids began to grow up so fast. It seems you trade the freedom and excitement of being young for the stability of age, and I guess that is a good trade off. After all, every year brings another enjoyable chapter in my life. Gone are the days of waking up and grabbing a beer to take the hair of the dog. Here are the mornings at the breakfast nook eating pancakes and watching a three year old trying to pour her own milk.
I guess that's OK. Maybe I'm not really old. Maybe I won't be old until I stop thinking people falling off roofs, or smashing their faces into the ground trying to show off is funny. When I stop going to sites like this to laugh, will I be old then?