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a girl question

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       Alright ive known this girl for about a year now and ive decided that i like her alot and would like a relationship with her. She is a great girl who any guy would like and of course she already has a boyfriend. Shes been with this other guy for about a year and a half but she seems almost like she wants a change. I dont really make a major move because i dont want our friendship to fall victim to the awkardness that a rejection might bring, but just about 3 months ago we were at this party (neither of us were drinking)and we ended up dosing off together. She slept in my arms for a good part of the night, which was one of the greatest experiences of my life, until I woke up to go to the bathroom and ended up waking her up when i was laying back down. She got a little bit closer and ended up holding my hand. So i started gently rubbing her stomach with my free hand and she starts stroking my arm with hers. We do this for a short time and to my amazement she lightly wispers the words, "just do it." At first i wasent quite sure what she was referring to but i soon realized that she wanted me to kiss her. I did so and she kissed me back and we end up hooking up that night. But remember at this time she is still with her boyfriend of 1 1/2 years so i really didnt know what to think about the whole thing. The next day we hung out and we talk about what happened the night before and she seemed pretty cool with it so i thouhgt maybe, just maybe, that i might have a chance with this girl. A couple days go by and i decide to tell her how i feel and that i want to be with her. She didnt quite take it as well as i thouhgt she would. She totally threw my feelings out the window and really let me have it. She told me everything that she hated about me and how she thought a relationship between us would never work. I was totally devestated and decide that im not going to talk to her for the next couple days. Suprisingly the next day she texts me and wants to hang out with me like the events of the previous night never happened. I go and act like nothing happened the night before as well and we have a great time together. So we go back to being friends and about 3 more months go by until i get a call from her at about 1am. I answer and i hear her in tears on the other end of the phone. I ask whats wrong and she tells me that she just broke up with her boyfriend. Im filled with a host of mixed emotions...excitement, sorrow for hearing her like this, anticipation, and a bit of confusion. She tells me that she broke up with her boyfriend because she didnt want to be in a relationship going into her senior year of high school so the graduation and leaving him wouldnt be so hard. So i just comfort her and tell her she did the right thing so she dosent fell too bad. But sadly for me all i hear when she tells me this is, "I dont want a boyfriend," and since all i want to do is be her boyfriend i feel pretty shitty with the coming of this news. So then about a week goes by when me and her friend start drinking a little at talking.                                     - Nobody knows about me and the girl i likes hookup or the fact that i like her-.     But on this night i tell her friend about the whole situation and everything that happened between us. She tells me that she thinks this girl i like really likes me too and that she just dosent want to get serious with me for some reason. Her friend tells me that she thinks the girl i like wants to have her cake and eat it too. She says that the girl i like really does like me alot but still wants to kinda have her exboyfriend as a fall back. So i talk to the girl i like about her friends hypothesis and i kinda hint at the idea that she might like me and she dances around the topic but i finally mange to get her to admit that she really does care about me. So now i really dont know if i should try to  go along with this little "thing" that she wants to have which might cause me some heartache down the road, or just try to get over the girl that i want to be with which will be extremely hard because i like her ALOT. id appreciate some advice from u guys if u have any.

seana Uploaded 07/25/2008
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