So it's that time of the year again: when I send out my college applications. I haven't gotten into any of the universities within 100 miles of my house for the last three years, so I'm really hoping I get accepted this year! I have my eyes on a pretty nice county technical college just across town. I've sent them tons of letters over the last year, probably about three a day, addressed from different people saying that they should let Jake in. I hope they fall for it! I even addressed one from President Bush.
But, after writing so many applications, and all of those letters, too, I just can't seem to write an essay that I like. I've always liked writing a lot so I'm pretty creative. I really want to wow them, so I thought maybe I would try to write more of a short story instead of a traditional�essay.�I'll give you what I have so far and maybe you all can tell me if you like it or not, and what I should or shouldn't change:
In lieu of a tradional essay, I have decided to show off my creative talents and write a short story about how I feel I'll do in college. I hope you enjoy!
I could feel my biceps twitch as I plunged the blade deeper and deeper into the mess of guts that used to be my professor. The last of his life left his eyes with a violent spasm and the complete evacuation of his bowels. The rest of the class looked on with terror, but I wasn't done yet. I reached into the�gaping hole I left in his abdomen and pulled out the bloody, intertwined connection of intestines, cutting it loose at each end. I tied one end around the neck of the limp body that used to be Professor Sachs, and the other end around my waist. I marched my way up the center aisle of the lecture hall, the burden of dragging the 200 pound lifeless body made easy by the over saturation of adrenaline in my system.
The thick trail of blood, spotted with chunks of flesh and pus, made its way from the spot where I attacked Professor Sachs, from behind the projector screen, up through the�aisle, weaving through the halls, and finally ended at where I stood: the parking lot adjacent to the chemistry building. I took a moment to watch the beauty of the�pure white flecks of snow melt on the cooling body, its face contorted with pain, but still serene in death.
Sirens echoed through the empty passage ways between buildings as�I went to work.�I removed the saw from my backpack and cut through the thick flesh of his hamstring, down through the femur, and out the other side to completely sever his leg -- I did the same to remove his other. I arranged them in a V shape on the red stained snow. I removed both of his arms in the same fashion, using one to fill in the V and make an A, and the other to make the minus sign: to signify the A- this professor had�given me last semester. I never knew that I would take things this far when I failed on my promise to myself to maintain a 4.0 through college.
But that's how fucking serious I am about doing well at your school.
I gently pressed the blade I had used to kill him into my neck, and, as the blood flowed freely down my bare chest, I felt relief. I could never fail myself again. The cool touch of the snow covered asphalt was the last thing I ever felt.