September 3, 2009-Eternia   Shocking news from Castle Grayskull is being released this morning. Man-at-Arms described to reporters a disturbing scene he came across while checking the dungeons last night. "I just couldn't believe my eyes!" he exclaimed to the media .

   According to Man-at-Arms , he checked a secluded dungeon cell last night around 1:00 AM, after hearing strange noises. In the cell he found He-Man and his sworn enemy Skeletor, among others, in a drunken, nude orgy. "I knew He-Man was using again, but I don't think any of us knew how far he had fallen..." said Teela, Captain of the Royal Guard.

   He-Man, aka Prince Adam, has had a long history of substance abuse. Recently, it was thought that the Prince was on a path to recovery. His mother and father, King Randor and Queen Marlena, did not release a statement to the media about this incident. Their spokesman said "They were deeply concerned about their son."

   One of the other alleged participants in last nights debauchery, Gargamel, blew off the incident by saying "So your big hero is a drunken fairy...get over it." Hopefully, He-Man will get the help he needs, "By the power of Grayskull" get his life back on track, and once again protect Eternia. One of He-man's closest friends, Snagglepuss, summed it up best when he said "Heavens to Murgatroyd! Exit stage left even..." Heavens to Murgatroyd indeed.

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