Lee Oswald was Jack Kennedy's 2nd Cousin
You know how when you're sitting on the toilet, reading, and your legs fall asleep? Well my 3rd cousin works at Service Mechandise and he told me he could get me a 15% discount on anything. So, I told my dad, go ahead and sell the car...see if I care. Then my dog gets sick and pukes all over my best Members Only jacket (the maroon one). I call Charlie up and I say, "Not right now! My favorite episode of Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman is on."
After all that was settled, I see someone breaking into my car (the one my dad was selling), steals my Member's Only jacket (the one with the dog puke on it) and I can't even do anything about it because my legs are asleep. So, as soon as Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman is over, I'm going to Service Merchandise and get me a new jacket...at a nice discount.
On an unrelated note, Lee Oswald is not related to the Kennedy's. That was a typo.