The Samurai Pimp
The dorkasaurus "escort" service has been going well for Maxine "Maxy" Maxwell. Her phone was blowin' up every few minutes with lonely and bored housewives calling in and looking for some dorkasuarus lovin. In many cases, the "dorks" would report back that the women had smashed their computers with ball peen hammers; or tossed their cell phones or ipods in the washer, just so they had an excuse to get the hunky dorks to their homes. Whatever case, Maxy didn't care. Business was booming. In fact, even more dorkasaurus's were showing up on her downtown steel building. Maxy often wondered if they were arriving in murders because the building was shiny, or that they were provided with their choice of Droids or iwhatever phones. Maxy had the hookup to the "back of the truck" discount in the tech world. It was good being a dork pimp.
Chin Lee had been hearing about the new dorkasaurus escort service. At first, he didnt really pay it any attention. He specialized in women and he was an institution in the neighborhood. That all changed when his computers started going down and his girls wanted to call the dorkasaurus squad in. Chin Lee likes to keep his girls happy, but this seemed like trouble to the old man. He called in his nephew to look at his computer woes. The job was going to bigger than he thought and probably more expensive. Chin Lee thought he could barter with Maxy and get a good deal and keep his girls happy. He just had to keep the dorkasaurus crew focused and keep their minds off of the dalopogy. He phoned Maxy. She answered with a sultry, "Hello dahling. How can I be of service to you?" Chin Lee rolled his eyes and spoke directly, "Maxy. Its Chin Lee. I need a few of you boys ova here to look at my computa polembs. I want a deal though. Good pice and they keep they ding dongs in they pants." Maxy laughed, "You think your girls might really go for them, huh?" Chin Lee responded with, "Humph...just send dem ova!" He slammed the phone down. He wandered if his power was slipping away, just as the years had done.
Maxy wasnt sure what to think about Chin Lees phone call. Never had the old man even acknowledged her business, even though they were within a few blocks of each other. It could be, she reasoned, the dorks went to the females homes while the men came to the prostitutes. Women were so much more put together than men; they didnt want to sully themselves on disgusted crust stained sheets that untold numbers of others had found their jollies on. Maxy giggled as she thought of the dorks she would send to Chin Lee. Nothing but the dorkiest and hunkiest of the lot, she thought as her mind wandered to her stable of studly superconductors. Most definitely Lars, the Swedish sexpot with the fair hair and ice cold blue eyes, who could charm the pants off the most frigid of women by sliding in USB cables with his pale pink tongue. Poindexter was another dork shed send. He was constantly working out when he wasnt planted in front of his computer making home video movies for friends and family. That would be a talent Chin Lee could appreciate, Maxy thought, while the saliva gathered on the tip of her canines at the thought of watching Poindexter carry computer desktops up the stairs to her office. Maxy sent her best on their way to Chin Lees in their hybrid Dorks R Us car, chuckling at what she knew would be his stunned reaction.
Chin Lee was leaving for lunch when the two dorkasauri arrived. He told them where the computers were and what the problem was. They nodded and grabbed their tool bags from the car. Chin Lee thought about sticking around to oversee the process. However, he was old, tired, and hungry and wanted his lunch. He vacated his house of delight. Since most of the girls were either busy or taking a lunch, he assumed things would be fine. He was mistaken.
Lars and Poindexter were checking out the computer room. They were doing some network checks: traffic, IP address assignments, and a bandwidth assessment. They also checked the computers anti-virus situation and OS updates. The computers and the network hardware were both old. The two dorkasauri deduced that the equipment was just too old and they would need to update it. This decision would have to be made by Chin Lee. So they waited. After a few minutes, two of Chin Lees girls walked passed the door of the computer room. They must have got a look at Lars and Poindexter because they backed up and stood in the door way. They leaned into the door frame making flirty conversation with the boys. The two dorks were busy making a list of the new equipment they would pitch to Chin Lee and barely acknowledged the two girls. The thought of installing the new computers and VPN routers was more than enough to bring smiles to their dorky faces. The girls had a challenge ahead of them.
Chin Lee's two favorite whores stared in lust-filled wonder at the dorks furiously working on the computers. Poindexter's long, tanned fingers slid over the keyboard with ease and the confidence of a man who knew how tp manipulate and control things with a slight touch of a finger. Jasmine licked her red painted lips as she imagined Poindexter's fingers manipulating her skin, her lips, and her body like a keyboard. Unable to resist the siren call of the dorkasuarus, Jasmine sidled closer, hiking up her already short skirt, so that the bottom of her lusciously round ass showed just enough for a tease. Jasmine leaned over Poindexter to feign ignorance and ask what he was doing, but in reality, her goal was to rub her DD boobs on his shoulder. Poindexter would be in her bed in less than 10 minutes. No one turned Jasmine down for a free-be.
Jasmines breasts were enough to pull Poindexter out of his computer filled frenzy. He looked up into Jasmines sexy eyes; she giggled and playfully bit her finger. Poindexter glanced in the opposite direction to see Angel sitting on Lars lap. Poindexter looked back at Jasmine and said, Well I guess it is break time. He stood up and put one hand on her gorgeous ass and kissed her sweet lips. She tasted like candy. He kissed her deeply for a moment and she pushed his kisses down to her neck. She smelled so sweet that Poindexter wanted to kiss every part of her body. Jasmine moaned and tossed her head back. Poindexter slipped his hand under her panties and teased her; his mouth drew closer to her breasts. Jasmine pulled away and began wiggling her top down. With her breasts nearly exposed, Poindexter reached over to help. Suddenly a loud banging halted the tryst. Jasmine peaked into the hallway and Angel jumped to her feet. Jasmine shrieked, "Chin Lee!" The dorks smiles turned to worry. The old mans shadow inched closer to the computer room. He appeared in the door with a long, thin, shiny Samurai sword at his side. He played with his thin grey beard and said quietly, "Wad da fuk id goin on in hee?"
Chin Lee was in shock. Two of his best money makers were sharing the goods for free. That was not going to happen. Chin Lee growled to himself. He should have known that his girls would never be able to resist the dorks; and the dorks would not be immune to the girls' abilities. Chin Lee's anger spilled into the next dimension; he called forth his peers from the shadows, his enforcers who roamed the whore house halls silently and patiently, waiting for just this moment. The ninjas swept in silently and surrounded the oblivious dorks, who were focused on the warm bodies writhing in their laps. Each ninja raised a deadly sword above the dork's heads and awaited instructions from Chin Lee who, at that moment, made his presence known.
Chin Lee swung his delicate but powerful sword at one of the computer monitors. A cascade of sparks flew from the box as it split like a ripe melon. The girls sprang from the dork's laps. The ninjas knew that was their cue. Both of their swords came down on top of Poindexter and Lars crotch. Their once turgid members shriveled like being dunked in ice water. The swords stopped short of any slicing. Chin Lee stared at the dorks with great intensity. He stroked his thin beard in order to calm his raging anger. He gathered his thoughts slowly and deliberately. Chin Lee then spoke, "You two get da fuk outta my hoe house. You tell Maxy dis shit stops now. She take her benniss to anuda neighbo-hood. It not respectable to me. You guys got dat? You come back on Sunday, when no girls here, to fix my computas...undastan?" The dorks nodded and quickly left grabbing their crotches in case Chin Lee changed his mind. Chin Lee suddenly felt better about his day and himself as an aging man in the whore trade.