"Assholes are just douche bags with experience and a little talent. I call assholes douche bags, because after you scratch the surface, you find the same person. Oh, and assholes always finish last. Assholes are ok in small doses.... they seem interesting until you get to know them... and then you realize all of those once hilarious jokes, sayings, and even the personality, is just an act, and all they've got. Sure they're charming, but wouldn't know a damn thing about what's really important... and it's usually their downfall."
That was a comment left on my post An Asshole by Any Other Name Wouldnt Be As Lovable on the website EbaumsWorld.com by a member Tyaeda . Below is my reply.
Assholes are just douche bags with experience and a little talent. Kind of! there is more to an asshole than that though.Why are we better? An asshole is a professional; a douche bag is an amateur. Of course there are people in the crowd that tell the same lame jokes and manage to hold attention of some dumb boob job and that idiot form jersey shore (take your pick) for a few moments. But like a frame in a movie, theyre just one of many, they dont stand out, they arent real assholes. Their 15 minutes in the spotlight soon fades and everyone forgets their name
The rest of us work hard at it, we are honest successful people, most just call us asshole because they dont know how to express how bad they want to be like us. Assholes are dedicated to constantly improving themselves for the better; working hard on our attitude, manors, and charm plus we smell much better.
Good examples of proper assholes; Denis Leary, Daniel Tosh, Mark Zuckerburg, & of course Me. These are real assholes. What you describe is a douche bag who wishes to be an asshole; like anything not everyone can do what we do, hard as they may try. Do some Googling you will discover these people are disliked for their opinions, success, and how they achieved such success not because they are annoying one trick dickheads.
What Im saying is you have yet to meet a genuine asshole like me, just a series of douche bags trying to be me. Give genuine assholes a chance we make a great addition to any social circle. Will be a perfect friend? No, we will always be more interested in our gain than yours, but we wont lie about it. We will tell you straight up we dont want to help you move or deal with your dog pinching a loaf on my couch in an attempt to deal with its abandonment issues; in the same breath we will be there for the strong straight answers when you need them.