We all know those damn liberal Commie Reds are trying to take over America.  I've seen many of them eating red apples and red cherries and red strawberries!  Some of them even eat watermelon and drink Big Red!

What we need to do to solve this problem is outlaw any food that's the color red.  I mean ALL of them!  We need to outlaw red apples,beets,red cabbage,cherries,cranberries, red grapes, red peppers, red potatoes, radishes, raspberries, rhubarb, strawberries, tomatoes, watermelon, and anything else that looks red or has the name red in it!  We need to outlaw red drinks, red shirts, red dresses, red cars, and the Boston Red Socks!  They're all Commie Socialist!  We need to remove the red stripes from the American flag, too!  Anything that implies red must be eliminated!

Once we have everything red eliminated, the Commie Socialist Liberal threat will be solved!  Where would those Libtards vegans be without their red vegetables to munch on?  They'll be hard pressed to scare children into their liberal "wolf at the door" mentality without the story of "Little Red Riding Hood!"  We also need to get rid of any reference to Red Fox, Red Buttons, Red Adair, or any of those other Commie Socialist heroes.  Once that's done.  I'm going to be a little sad to see red meat and Red Dawn go, but it's for the good of the country!