My mom and I were walking in the house and she saw our girl cat licking her chops. My mom says, " Well I guess she must've just had something good to eat!"

I reply, " Yeah, her ass!"

My cousin and my dad were talking about the nearest Dick's Sporting Goods store and how it moved to a bigger building down the road in a newly built plaza. Nobody in my family really quite believes that I saw the " coming soon" sign advertising it's new location. Anyway, Pat goes, " Well, that must be a big Dick's. " My NINE year old brother and I were the first ones to get it. Bob ( 15 ) caught on pretty quick. My dad and Pat were the last ones to get it.

Well, you know what they say, he who laughs last thinks slowest.