Top
Advertisement

Dear Dad You were right, Some People are Assholes!

Dear Dad;

    It's been four years since you passed away up in Idaho, and you were right, right about a lot of things Dad!
    I'm out of the NAVY now, boy did Mom flip out when I told her I had all ready signed up after she came up for graduation. I made her take me to the Latin Quarter for dinner, where we went and picked up that hooker on that last bike trip, I made Mom watch me drink shots of tequila like a real man; didn't tell her about the hooker though, I'll save that for one of her "sweats." When I told her I was going right from college to NAVY RTC, she flipped right the fuck out, you would have been so proud of me that evening. I'm now out of the very same NAVY you were in Dad, and, you know what? You were right. Service to country is important and all that but, there are lots of assholes in the military. You had to salute a picture of GHWBush and Dan Quayle, I had to salute Obama's. Yeah I know, you liked him and all.
    And, you wanna' know what else Dad? After teaching school for one year now, there are lots of assholes in the school teaching business too! Just like you said. Damn, I see Kids on some weird drugs too, drugs that don't make you sit down, shut up and eat tacos... no, not these days, these kids have some Gummy Bears soaked in drugs that make them get right in my face and call me, "B"... B? as if I didn't know what that means. B indeed!  I so wanted to slap a few admins after this first year of teaching too Dad, I got some super glue, but I don't think I'll glue the Principal to his chair, not yet anyway. I'm teaching middle school music up north Dad, I learned to hate that Phoenix heat too, just like you did. Sure miss you in the Summer time Dad. Miss those epic bike rides across country looking for a party girl, long love and a good time. Some asshole finally burned up Sedona too Dad, I hear they got it mostly put out, but the switchbacks are a mess. Teaching music is easy up here Dad but people are hard, people are assholes!
    That student of yours from Idaho, the one that was taken POW in Afghanistan, well... he's almost home now and, guess what Dad! Turns out, he's an asshole too! Some security & drinkin' buddies of mine in the NAVY tell me he would have won Hustler Magazine's Asshole of the Month for what he did to get captured! They tell me he smoked Hash with the natives, dropped his rifle and went for a walk and thought he was the second coming of Christ or some such shit... Long story Dad.
    I'll write it down and send you a blog some time on this upholstered brothel you used to call home. Imagine that? Dad felt right at home around here Blogging on EBaum's World. Don't write or read 'em much myself, just look at pron... People are assholes, but naked chicks are cool!
    I got married too Dad. You'd like her, she's so H O T, and smart too Dad. She's a technician at the new high security science building at the university up here in the pines. She gets way better $$$ and bennies than I do, wait, you always said teachers were always at the bottom of the barrel for health insurance. Damned asshole Governor of ours has cut more than $400,000,000 from public ed. funding since you passed away Dad... Fucking Republicans and Mormons around here are still out of control too Dad, "Can't swing a dead cat without hitting a Republican in Aridzona!" you'd say. That always pissed off Mom and, "her side." Some of Mom's family are real assholes Dad, but you knew that.
    I don't hear much from step-Mom but we never really got to spend much time together after you passed.
Maybe I'll ask my wife if she'll quit that sweet job of hers and move up to Idaho like you did after you and Mom split up, you told me they have even MORE Republicans and Mormons but at least it's cool; I really didn't mind the deeper snow up there or here in the Winter, like you always said, "Screw this heat."
I don't think of Bo Bo too much but, I Love and miss you Dad.
Wallboy Junior writes on, Right Arm Dad!
4
Ratings
  • 226 Views
  • 1 Comments
  • 0 Favorites
  • Flag
  • Flip
  • Pin It

1 Comments

  • Advertisement