10 Awesomely Odd Beers
    Beer has been a past time of mine for many years now. Starting off in middle school with the usual piss water of Coors Light, I grew tired of it as I got older and ventured off into craft brews. Some great, some awful, and some just absolutely bizarre. Intrigued by this I decided to take a peak around the world and create this list of ten awesomely odd beers.

1)    5,000 year old beer recipe
A recipe has been found for beer dating back 5,000 years ago in Sumerian “Hymn to Ninkasi." It was created at the University of Chicago by archaeologists and brewers from the Great Lakes Brewing Company. Beer is a science and needs to be studied. Right? 

    They did everything possible to make it to the exact order of the recipe. They used equipment that would have been used back then and ever had a baker to recreate the yeast as best as possible. They even went as far as to not use modern cleaning methods to kill bacteria that occur naturally. 

"Hey, this beer is green and probably filled with bacteria. We should start over and clean everything."
"Nonsense Johnson! We are men here! Cleaning is for women!"

    After brewing, it is said to have tasted too sour compared to modern beer and even tasted like vinegar. If this was the standard beer back then I do not want to know what the cheap shit of that time period tasted like. Probably piss. It would probably have tasted like pure unfiltered piss. 
http://www.bathroomreader.com/2013/07/whats-on-tap-5000-year-old-beer-recipe/

2)    The oldest intact beer
    This beer was found in a shipwreck in 2011 and is dated to the early 1800's. Four taste testers got to try it and said it tasted "very old", "acidic" and with "burnt notes". Very useful guys. http://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-12393875

    The scientists involved are going to take DNA from yeast and try determine exactly what kind of yeast was used and try to replicate in modern day. They must not have heard of the guys above with the 5,000 year old beer. 
 
"This beer is about 200 years old. Who wants to try it? I don't want to waste money on paying professional taste testers."

3)    Beer with the oldest yeast strain
    Fossil Fuels Brewing Company brewed a beer with the oldest yeast strain to date. How old? Over 45 million fucking years old. That's how old. http://www.fossilfuelsbrewingco.com/

    Raul Cano discovered the strain in Burmese amber dating to the Eocene Period. I'm going to assume he heard about the other two stories above about old beer and decided to give them a never ending "fuck you" by finding and using over 45 million year old yeast. Surprisingly, it got great reviews on it's taste saying that has a "weird spiciness at the finish." The rest of it was to badass to describe. 

"All I can taste is the huge amount of balls this beer has. Also it has a weird spiciness at the finish. I rate this beer as absolutely unfuckwithable."

4)    Beard yeast
    Yup. That's exactly what it sounds like. Beer brewed with yeast grown in the master brewers beard. http://www.rogue.com/roguebeers/
    It was determined that John Maier's beard was the optimal place to grow the new yeast. 

"John's beard is perfect! So massive, thick, and powerful, this yeast will be unstoppable! Also just look at his beard. It's got the perfect volume to bounce ratio. Good job John. Good job."

    He used his beard yeast for over 15,000 brews he was there for. Each bottle contains beard magic and wisdom with only a few hairs mixed in for flavor.

5)    Pre-digested elephant beer
    Sound nasty to you? Yup. Same here. This beer is brewed from coffee beans that have been eaten by elephants. After they shit the beans out, coffee is made and then brewed. There is no mention if there is a flavor, odor, or chunk or two of shit in the beer. I'm going to assume so and never in my life go find this beer to try it. 

    If you know anything of Japan's insane culture of food and drink, then you may have guessed that of all the places in the world, this happens to come from Japan. Surpirsed?  I'm not either. The name is a joke on the word that means shit. http://en.rocketnews24.com/2013/04/06/we-try-beer-made-with-coffee-from-an-elephants-butt/

    Think it would taste awful? Apparently not. It was reported to be actually quite delicious, with a strong, bitter taste followed by a wave of sweetness and a mellow body. 

    Oh by the way, it sold out in minutes at the price of $1,000 a bottle. Good going Japan?
 
"So, when the elephant is done shitting, we're going to brew it, sell it for an insane price, and give it a stupid name. Yes this is totally going to take off. Do you not see the other insane that exists in this country?"

6)    Bacon and syrup flavored beer
    The beard beer people are back. They call it a "collision of craziness". Yea I'd say that this is a pretty crazy but possibly insanely tasty idea. They say it is best paired with pork or pastries. http://magazine.foxnews.com/food-wellness/11-strange-beers-youll-actually-want-try

    What about pork covered in pastry? Or a pastry filled with pork? They could potentially kill two birds with one stone at this point and really corner their market. Bizarre beer paired with an equally bizarre pastry? Gold mine. Good day sir. I'm going to write them a letter right now.
 
"Dude. I don't know if I'm just severely wasted or having a genius moment where we take these bacon donuts and brew them into a beer. No John. The beard beer was not crazy enough."

7)    Beer made with pig heads and bones
    I have no idea what to think of this beer in the slightest. Surprisingly it took the gold medal at the Great American Beer Festival in 2011. They entered in the experimental category. What an experiment it must have been. http://magazine.foxnews.com/food-wellness/11-strange-beers-youll-actually-want-try. This creation is from Right Brain Brewery. It is said ti be “infused with a symphony of salty, smoky and savory flavors.” This has to be one of the most insane and over the top symphonies I have ever heard of. http://www.rightbrainbrewery.com/gateway.php
 
           
There is no greater symphony than the hell brew created with pig heads and bones. This symphony is the elevator music in Hell.

8)    Hornet yeast
    Brewed by Peter Hepp at Eataly in NYC, this beer is brewed with yeast from the abdomens of hornets. How he thought of this idea I do not know. He many have tried to one-up the pig head brews. http://magazine.foxnews.com/food-wellness/11-strange-beers-youll-actually-want-try

    It was developed with Dogfish Head Brewery. In an idea to create a beer that was entirely Italian, they used yeast from the land that was found on the abdomen of hornets. Nothing odd as fuck about this. Not in the slightest. It is said to have,  “spice-forward notes,” thanks to ingredients, like myrhh resin, “which produces a very rich, old world perfume.” What in the fuck is myrhh resin and why is it giving my beer the smell of perfume? Just what the fuck is going on in this beer?
 
        
"So we take the yeast from these hornets, use it to brew beer and add some weird named resin to make it smell like perfume. This is absolutely fool proof. We got this."

9)    Oyster beer
    Yup. I wanna puke too. This comes from Flying Dog Ales in Maryland. It is brewed with Rappahonnock River oysters. http://flyingdogales.com/pearl-necklace-oyster-stout-now-year-round/

    At one point a limited edition brew, it in now being brewed year round. Apparently there are that many people out there that like foul sounding beer that keep this going. Proceed go towards restoring oysters to the local areas. I got an idea. If oysters are a species in need of restoration, why not use them to restore the area instead of brewing them into fucking beer? Who knows. Clearly all the people in this list are all off in their own special ways.
 
"In order to save the oysters, we're going to use oysters and beer out of them. Yes this is the best way to do this."

10)    Beer sold in dead animals
    Made for the animal and possibly human killer to the that taxidermist you know and love. This is a beer from Brewdog. It is 50% ABV and is sold for $765. As if that wasn't odd and crazy enough it gets better by having each bottle put in a squirrel or weasel. This was a limited edition brew of only twelve bottles. Ironically it's called "The End of History". They say this is to push the boundaries of extreme brewing. This is by far mother fucking godamn extreme. https://www.brewdog.com/lowdown/blog/the-end-of-history

    Now they can only make it slightly more extreme if they took ideas from the pig head beer, the beard brew, and the 45 million year old yeast beer. 
 
That beer would be unstoppable and would probably kill a few people and be banned in certain countries.