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One night at school my friend had come down from bridgton and we went to an apartment complex to party. My friend knew the girl that owned the apartment that we went to and she happened to have a funnel. Once it hit my lips, it was so good and i ended up hammered. I decided at around 3 that i was going to walk the 5 miles back to my dorm and go to sleep. I grabbed my jacket and headed out. After about an hour of walking around the complex i realized i didnt know where the fuck i was and that it was the middle of January and i was frozen. I saw some fat dude with an awkward mustache walking around and i asked him if he knew what direction umass was. he pointed me in the direction and i was off. I heard him calling to me saying that he would give me a ride. i hopped in his car and threw on my seatbelt. On the way, i figured out that im retarded and he was probably going to rape me the first chance he got. but, apparently he was a delivery guy for chicagos pizza and he was going right near my dorm anyway. When we got to chicagos i hopped out and thanked him. Now, since he is a saint, he said that chicagos was closing and he had an extra pizza that had my name on it. I ate 2 pieces on the way back and traded the rest of it for cigarettes from a random group of kids.

Gmelon Uploaded 08/13/2008
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