BREAKING NEWS: Hurricane Neko heading towards the eastern coast of eBaum's World.
Hello and welcome to the Neko News. I am Andrew Ryan, your trusty and omniscient weatherman, here to bask my fellow listeners in terrifying news, especially for those who are filled with anger and rage.
Hurricane Neko, classified as a Category Infinite, is approaching towards the eastern coast of eBaum's World, most likely threatening the plethora of haters who constantly spam the eBaum's World blog section with blogs littered with incoherency and an influx of anger. Here is a live shot of the hurricane approaching the state of butthurt babies:
The severity of the hurricane itself is quite extreme - in fact, if one was to attempt to combat the hurricane, one would be automatically defeated and completely humiliated by the remarkable radiance of Hurricane Neko.
Here are a few tips in order to survive through the wrath of Hurricane Neko:
- do not instigate Hurricane Neko and simply do not anger Hurricane Neko.
- do not assume that you are more intelligent than Hurricane Neko because you aren't.
- do not assume that you are stronger than Hurricane Neko because the wind speed of Hurricane Neko is so fast that you will be Neko Punched within seconds.
- do not befriend Gyps as Gyps normally doesn't know what the fuck she's doing half of the time.
- do not attempt to withstand Hurricane Neko by drinking a copious amount of alcohol or frying your brain with a brick of marijuana.
- always run for shelter, preferably away from the computer, when Hurricane Neko is lurking.
Thank you for cooperating and please stay safe ... remember, do not hinder the pathway of Hurricane Neko with your mortal self.