How to Go to Heaven

A teacher was testing the children in her Sunday School class to see if they understood the concept of getting to Heaven.

She asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?"

"NO!" the children answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and
kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"

Again, the answer was, "NO!"

"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?" she asked them again.

Again, they all answered, "NO!"

She continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"

A six-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE FUCKIN' DEAD!"