Have sexual apparatus strewn about the backseat of your car as you conduct driving test.

When you read for the eye test, announce "P...O...R...N...O...hey! What kind of eye test is this?"

When you take driving test, pull out frozen fishsticks and place them on the dash. Explain you never go anywhere without them. Call one of them Francis and repeatedly scold him throughout the test.

After successfully parallel parking, crack a beer out of the glovebox. Tell evaluator parallel parking is a 'real bitch.'

Equipment: a melon and a folding chair.Put the melon in line, then casually saunter over to your chair and visibly relax. Periodically ask the person behind said melon to "please advance the melon."