Act like you know the order taker from somewhere. Say "Bed-Wetters' Camp, right?"
After ordering, say "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.
Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.
Answer their questions with questions.
Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.
Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g. If phoning Domino's, ask for a Cheeser! Cheeser!)
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.
Ask if the pizza has had its shots.
Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.
Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.
Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a description to go with the term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.
Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.
Ask to see a menu.
Ask what the order taker is wearing.
Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.
Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.
Be vague in your order.
Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be ashamed.
Call to complain about service. Later, call to say you were drunk and didn't mean it.
Change your accent every three seconds.
Crack your knuckles into the receiver.
Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If he/she says it, say "Please don't mention that word."
Detect the order taker's psychic aura. Use it to your advantage.
Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.
Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say "Where was I? Who are you?"
Eliminate verbs from your speech.
Engage in some serious swapping.
Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the hour to say, "This is your (time of day) wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up.
Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.
Haggle.
Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background.
Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."
If any of the above practices are rejected by the order taker,
If he/she suggests a side order, ask why he/she is punishing you.
If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."
If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say "OK. That'll be .99; please pull up to the first window."
If using a touch-tone press 9-1-1 every 5 seconds throughout the order.
If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
Imitate the order taker's voice.
In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.
Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.
Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.
Make a list of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.
Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream goodbye at the top of your lungs.
Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say "I said 'sauce smothered with meat'."
Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging.
Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.