Husband comes back from work early and finds a naked man in his bed. "Where's my wife?" he asked the guy. The naked man replied "She's taking a shower."

The husband thinks for a minute and says "I'll hide in the closet and see what happens next. Don't say a word or you'll be sorry."

As promised, he hid in the closet and waited for his wife to come out of the shower.

"Sweetheart, take me! Take me hard! So hard that I'll piss myself!" said the wife to her lover. The guy replied "When we're done, check the closet and you'll shit yourself too."