1. I know when you`ve been bad or good -- so let's skip the small talk, sister!

2. Hey Babe, when was the last time you did it in a sleigh?

3. Ever make it with a fat guy with a whip?

4. Some of my best toys run on batteries... <wink wink>

5. I see you when you're sleeping - and you don't wear any underwear, do you?

6. Screw the "nice" list -- I've got you on my "nice AND naughty" list!

7. Wanna join the "Mile High" club?

8. That's not a candy cane in my pocket, honey. I'm just glad to see you!

9. The whip ain't just for the reindeer, sweetcheeks.

10. How'd you like to get all harnessed-up, you little Vixen?

11. Whattaya say, babe -- you, me, a rooftop and a nice chilled bottle of 2% lowfat?

12. Wanna feel the Christmas spirit inside you?

13. You know, after staring at reindeer butts all night, yours looks especially appealing.

14. Technically, I'm not allowed to leave your house until I've properly stuffed *all* your stockings.

15. Well, what do you know... there *is* a creature stirring.

16. Forget the cookies and milk. Can I have a go at your cupcakes?

17. I`ve got something special in the sack for you!

18. Are you interested in seeing the "North Pole"?

19. I've got something you can hang a wreath on.

20. I put the "scroo" in Scrooge!