Hillbilly Goes Car Shopping
scubadude
Published
07/25/2011
An oversized hillbilly farmer complete with straw hat and overalls goes to a auto dealer to buy a new truck and is soon approached by a junior sized salesman fresh from the city.
"What can I help you with today, sir?" asks the salesman as he ponders the hayseed..
"Ya see," says the farmer, "I have fallen in love and I need a new truck so me and my sweetie can go a courtin."
"We don't have too many trucks in stock right now, but we have some fantastic deals on these here minivans. They can carry a bunch of stuff, they ride real nice, and they get better mileage."
"I don't know." says the farmer. "My love is what you would call pretty hefty and I don't think there'd be enough room in the back for us to have our relations."
"I guarantee there is more than enough room. All you have to do is fold all the seats down, like this." adds the salesman as he demonstrates putting the seats down.
The farmer ponders it for a bit and then says, "Okay, I'll take yer word for it. It sure is purdy. Ya got yerself a deal." They shake on it and go inside to do the paperwork.
Two weeks later the farmer comes back and he is mighty mad as he walks up to the salesman. "Ya lied to me about that van and I came to get my money back." bellows the big farmer.
"Okay, let's keep calm about this." trembles the little salesman. "Is there something wrong with the van? It's under warranty you know, and we'll fix it for free."
"It aint broke." fumes the farmer. "It just aint big enough for me and my sweetie to...ya know?"
"I am very sorry to hear that. You folded the seats down, right?" asks the salesman.
"Yep, I folded the back seats and the middle seats just like ya told me and there just wasn't enough room. Heck, I couldn't even get the tailgate down without bumping her in the backside." says the frustrated farmer.
"Well, I did guarantee it would work. Let's go inside and see what we can do to make you happy. We got some new trucks in just the other day." says the relieved salesman.
"Fine." adds the hillbilly. "But you need to stop tellin' stories to folks around here cuz there is no way in heck ya can fit a man my size and a Holstein heifer in the back of one of these here vans."
"What can I help you with today, sir?" asks the salesman as he ponders the hayseed..
"Ya see," says the farmer, "I have fallen in love and I need a new truck so me and my sweetie can go a courtin."
"We don't have too many trucks in stock right now, but we have some fantastic deals on these here minivans. They can carry a bunch of stuff, they ride real nice, and they get better mileage."
"I don't know." says the farmer. "My love is what you would call pretty hefty and I don't think there'd be enough room in the back for us to have our relations."
"I guarantee there is more than enough room. All you have to do is fold all the seats down, like this." adds the salesman as he demonstrates putting the seats down.
The farmer ponders it for a bit and then says, "Okay, I'll take yer word for it. It sure is purdy. Ya got yerself a deal." They shake on it and go inside to do the paperwork.
Two weeks later the farmer comes back and he is mighty mad as he walks up to the salesman. "Ya lied to me about that van and I came to get my money back." bellows the big farmer.
"Okay, let's keep calm about this." trembles the little salesman. "Is there something wrong with the van? It's under warranty you know, and we'll fix it for free."
"It aint broke." fumes the farmer. "It just aint big enough for me and my sweetie to...ya know?"
"I am very sorry to hear that. You folded the seats down, right?" asks the salesman.
"Yep, I folded the back seats and the middle seats just like ya told me and there just wasn't enough room. Heck, I couldn't even get the tailgate down without bumping her in the backside." says the frustrated farmer.
"Well, I did guarantee it would work. Let's go inside and see what we can do to make you happy. We got some new trucks in just the other day." says the relieved salesman.
"Fine." adds the hillbilly. "But you need to stop tellin' stories to folks around here cuz there is no way in heck ya can fit a man my size and a Holstein heifer in the back of one of these here vans."
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