What do you call a Chinese postman?
May-Ling

A snail walks into a bar, the barman throws him out.
nine months later the snail walks in and asks "Why did you do that?"

What do you call a man with a car on his head?
Jack

How many wizards does it take to screw in a light bulb?
2, one to hold the bulb and one to spin the room

how many policemen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
none, they just beat the room for being black