An older man had met a younger woman, but unfortunately he was unable
to last very long before he would orgasm during sex.
A caring man, he was concerned that he was disappointing his new
lover, so he called his doctor for advice. The doc told him
that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the
act. The man decided, "What the hell, I'll try it."

He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn't
do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open.
He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe.
Finally, he realized his solution. On his way home, he pulled his truck
over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as
if he was examining the truck.
Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to masturbate.

He closed his eyes and thought of his lover. As he grew closer to orgasm,
he felt a quick tug at the bottom of his pants.

Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm,
he kept his eyes shut and replied "What?" He heard, "This is the police.
What the hell are you doing?" The man replied,
"I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted." The cop says, "Well,
you better check your brakes too, because your truck
rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago.