A ventriloquist visited a farm one day and sees the farmer sitting on his porch with his dog.

Ventriloquist: Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?

Farmer: The dog doesn’t talk…

Ventriloquist: Hey dog, how’s it going?

Dog: Doin’ all right.

Farmer: extreme look of shock

Ventriloquist: Is this your owner? pointing at Farmer

Dog: Yep

Ventriloquist: How’s he treat you?

Dog: Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play.

Farmer: look of disbelief

Ventriloquist: Mind if I talk to your horse?

Farmer: The horse doesn’t talk..

Ventriloquist: Hey horse, how’s it going?

Horse: Cool.

Farmer: extreme look of shock

Ventriloquist: Is this your owner? pointing at Farmer

Horse: Yep

Ventriloquist: How’s he treat you?

Horse: Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.

Farmer: total look of amazement

Ventriloquist: Mind if I talk to your sheep?

Farmer: The Sheep is a VILE LIAR!!