How do men define marriage?
A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

One golfer to another: " I got a set of golf for my wife." Second golfer "Nice trade"


What's the difference about a woman and a goddess?
About 5 beers.

The best way to stop the annoying noise in your car is to let it drive.

If a man speaks in a forest and there are no women around, is he still wrong?

How many men does it take to open a beer can?
None. it should be open when she gives it to him.

Q: Why did the woman cross the road?
A: That's hardly the question. The better question is who let her out of the kitchen.

Scientist proved that beer has small traces of female hormones. They fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

Q: How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Who cares? Let her cook and clean in the dark.

Women are like guns; keep one long enough and you'll want to shoot it.

Q:How do you fix a woman's watch?
A: You don't need to... there's a clock on the oven.