The Simpsons Greatest Quotes

flying1368 Published 02/12/2013

We've all used one at one time or another

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1.
Operator! Give me the number for 911!
2.
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? The birth of Santa.
3.
Go out on a Tuesday? Who am I, Charlie Sheen?
4.
I'd be mortified if someone ever made a lousy product with the Simpson name on it
5.
What good is money if it cant inspire terror in your fellow man?
6.
For every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.
7.
Oh boy. Looks like it's suicide again for me
8.
Now make like my pants, and split.
9.
Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark.
10.
Me fail English? That's unpossible.
11.
For the next five minutes, I'm going to party like it's on sale for 19.99
12.
Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot.
13.
Fire can be our friend whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.
14.
I've been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, pug fugly, but never ugly ugly.
15.
Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all...nothing at all...nothing at all!
16.
I was saying "Boo-urns."
17.
Remember the time he ate my goldfish, and you lied to me and said I never had any goldfish. Then why'd I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?
18.
Uh, no you've got the wrong number. This is 9-1... 2
19.
Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.
20.
I'm Bart Simpson who the hell are you?
21.
A man who envies our family is a man who needs help
22.
Spend less time on your back and more time on your knees
23.
Ah, don't feel too bad. I was wrestling wolves when you were still suckling at your mother's teat.
24.
Thats why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them.
25.
Why would anyone want to hurt me? I'm this century's Dennis the Menace!
26.
Stupider like a fox!
27.
Oh, Im in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I dont have to listen to myself. Im drunk.
28.
I'm trying to be a sensitive father, you unwanted moron!
29.
You don't win friends with salad
30.
D'OH!

1.
Operator! Give me the number for 911!
2.
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? The birth of Santa.
3.
Go out on a Tuesday? Who am I, Charlie Sheen?
4.
I'd be mortified if someone ever made a lousy product with the Simpson name on it
5.
What good is money if it cant inspire terror in your fellow man?
6.
For every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.
7.
Oh boy. Looks like it's suicide again for me
8.
Now make like my pants, and split.
9.
Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark.
10.
Me fail English? That's unpossible.
11.
For the next five minutes, I'm going to party like it's on sale for 19.99
12.
Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot.
13.
Fire can be our friend whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.
14.
I've been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, pug fugly, but never ugly ugly.
15.
Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all...nothing at all...nothing at all!
16.
I was saying "Boo-urns."
17.
Remember the time he ate my goldfish, and you lied to me and said I never had any goldfish. Then why'd I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?
18.
Uh, no you've got the wrong number. This is 9-1... 2
19.
Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.
20.
I'm Bart Simpson who the hell are you?
21.
A man who envies our family is a man who needs help
22.
Spend less time on your back and more time on your knees
23.
Ah, don't feel too bad. I was wrestling wolves when you were still suckling at your mother's teat.
24.
Thats why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them.
25.
Why would anyone want to hurt me? I'm this century's Dennis the Menace!
26.
Stupider like a fox!
27.
Oh, Im in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I dont have to listen to myself. Im drunk.
28.
I'm trying to be a sensitive father, you unwanted moron!
29.
You don't win friends with salad
30.
D'OH!