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So Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer...
The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." Helium doesn't react.
Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of...
A Chemistry Joke
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron". The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies,...
Quotes from 11 year-old science exams
QUOTES FROM 11 YEAR OLDS’ SCIENCE EXAMS “Water is composed of two gins, Oxygen and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and...
Men Women The Science
Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. ...
A very handsome and even more confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then...
Science Fiction Pick-up Lines
You, me, here... this couldn't be any better if I programmed the holodeck myself! Your mouth says, 'Shields up!', but your eyes say, 'A hull...
No Need For God?
God is sitting in Heaven when a scientist says to Him, "Lord, we don't need you anymore. Science has finally figured out a way to create...
Heredity- Patroiophobia Illness- Nosemaphobia Infection- Mysophobia Injections- Tryanophobia Insanity- Maniaphobia Knees-...
The Wonders of God
A boy was sitting on a park bench with one hand resting on an open Bible. He was loudly exclaiming his praise to God. "Hallelujah!...
One atom bumps into another pretty hard, he says " Hey, are you all right"? Atom 2 exclaims, "I lost an electron"! ...
Science vs Religion
Science and religion are trapped in a dark room and they can't see anything. Science: Uh hello, is anyone here? Religion: Hey man, my name is...
Handy guide to modern science: If it's green or wriggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.
Two Hydrogen atoms are walking down the street. One says to the other, "I think I've lost an electron." "Are you sure?"...
Did you hear about the biologist who had twins? She baptized one and kept the other as a control.
What's the difference between a hormone and an enzyme? You can't hear an enzyme
Strangers on A Train
A scientist gets on a train to go to New York. His cabin also has a poor farmer in it. To pass the time the scientist decides to play a game with...
Did you know that scientists have determined a food that decreases the sex drive in women? WEDDING CAKE!
Boy Goes Off On Mom For Getting Pregnant
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