My first date was a memorable one and I'd like to share that evening with you. This is a true story.  I eagerly awaited picking this girl up all day, the type of girl you daydream about. Fine as hell in an 80's sort of way. I pulled up in front of her house in my hooptie pickup truck and walked up to her door to ring the doorbell. It was spring so the walkway that led to her house was lined with all types of blooming vines and flowering plants that smelled wonderful, setting the mood even better than I had hoped.  I walked her back down that same bloom lined path to my car and like a gentleman, I opened the door for her let her in and shut it behind her.  As I walked around the back of my truck to get to the drivers side door, that's when all those blossoms triggered my histamine response.  I felt a sneeze coming on like never before.  I always have a bad case of head depressurization for ten minutes after I sneeze; they are violent, and always result in a runny nose afterwards.  So I fought it off, hard.  ... Read more ...

Once upon a time, in a place overrun with monkeys, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.

The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest, and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, they became harder to catch, so the villagers stopped their effort.

The man then announced that he would now pay $20 for each one. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. But soon the supply diminished even further and they were ever harder to catch, so people started going back to their farms and forgot about monkey catching.

The man increased his price to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so sparse that it was an effort to even see a monkey, ... Read more ...