I heard this from a friend. Probably not fake, but still funny nevertheless.
Losing Weight
I'm a pretty over weight guy, about 250 lbs, so i wanted to lose some weight. I find this company that promises to be very motivating and guarantees weight loss. I call the company and order their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before me a sexy, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, I take off after her.
A few miles later huffing and puffing, I finally give up.
The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, I weigh myself and am delighted to find I have lost 10 lbs. as promised.
< ... Read more ...
I'll try to sum up a funny story that happened a few years ago:
I got a vasectomy.
I met a girl soon afterwards. She was nice and attractive but with a selfish streak that raised a big red flag. She was 32 at the time and I could practically HEAR her biological clock ticking. Regardless, she was a good lay, easy on the eyes, and reasonably good company.
I did NOT tell her about my vasectomy and I always used a condom with her to protect against STDs. She assumed, obviously, that the condom was only used for birth control. Silly girl.
We date for a few months. I never made any move towards commitment but she brought it up ocassionally. For me, this was a casual but pleasant relationship. For her - as I was to find out - it was part of life-changing series of events that she was planning very carefully.
Four months into dating, I get the "I'm pregnant" talk. She's going on and on about how the condom must have broke and now we really need to t ... Read more ...
- 1
- 2
