1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am tired = I am tired

3. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage

5. I love you = Lets have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex

7. What's wrong = I guess sex is out of the question

8. May i have this dance = I'd like to have sex with you

9. Can i call you sometime = I'd like to have sex with you

10. Do you want to go to the movies = I'd like to have sex with you

11. Can i take you out for dinner sometime = I'd like to have sex with you

12. Will you marry me = I want to make it illegal for others to have sex with you

< ... Read more ...

Ok its never, NEVER OK for a man to drink a light beer, it is a beverage for women and the Gay's. And honest to god putting a lime in the neck of a bottle of light beer, come on man up. It's just wrong if you're dieting then give up bread or potatoes never switch to light beer its wrong i say wrong. No man, no real man a sport watching boob looking ass slapping heterosexual man should drink light beer. Let me put it into a metaphor you will understand, Light beer is like getting a blow job from you're sister, it might be just like every other blow job you've ever had, but there's something about it that's just not right!!!!! Come to the dark side!!!

First off I'm Irish not british just so the idiots who keep calling me a dumb Brit know the difference. Secondly I do actually enjoy watching you're game of "football". Cant watch it live to many stops and breaks i watch the highlights.

OK so here goes

1st: Football (our sport) has been around longer

2nd: We actually use our feet for about 98% of the game where as American football is the opposite

3rd:Our football dominates the world with over 90% of the world playing or watching, It has even become so popular America is doing everything to get it to take off over there buy bringing over big name European footballers like David Beckham and paying them ridiculous amount's pf money to play. American football doesn't get this sort of global domination or audience's, even the Superbowl wouldn't get this much interest. 4/10 people only watch it for the half time show

4th If you were to properly name American football it would probably be stop-and-talk-then-pu ... Read more ...

OK what is with the idiots on eBaum's giving people negative replies and thumb's down all the time? Do they honestly think this will make there submissions become featured or get there comments on the next eBaum's funny comments section? For example today's featured submission some comedian died, I didn't know him but thought he looked familiar to an actor from 8 simple rules , so i asked was it him... Apparently that's worth a heap load of thumb's down replies..A simple yes that's him or no that's not him would do. Seriously people stop being fucking idiots..

Women Speak in Estrogen - Men Listen in Testosterone

Relationships: When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled "All Men Are Idiots". Then she will get on with her life.

A man has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the break-up, at 3:00 a.m. on a Saturday night, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I'll never forgive you, and I hate you, and you're a total floozy. But I want you to know that there's always a chance for us." This is known as the "I Hate You / I Love You" drunken phone call, that 99% of all men have made at least once. There are community colleges that offer courses to help men get over this need.

Sex: Women prefer 30-40 minutes of foreplay.

Men prefer 30-40 seconds of foreplay. Men consider driving back to her ... Read more ...