I pitter pattered into the kitchen and the most delightful thing a boy could smell was in there, it smelled like cookies, i adjusted my head sideways to see the most delightful thing a boy could see. it looked like cookies (it was). the shelf that the cookies rested upon were out of my grasp, so i grabbed a pair Nikes (TM) and elevated my height by centimeters. i then grabbed the cookies but suddenly THEY ERUPTED IN ANTS!

The ants crawled all over my body and ravaged me inappropriately and commenced in a vicious process of biting my body.  i rushed to the shower and turned on the water, but alas it was too cold for my entrance, so i stood there naked for 10 minutes while the water warmed. but then i just remembered ant safety school and doused myself in fire, with my foes vanquished and the horrible smell of burnt rubber filling the air. but i wasn't alone. a giant pepper peanut flavored cookie with giant hairy black legs ass blasted down the walls and crawled into my dojo. the cookie crumbled to the floor to reveal a giant queen ant. i pranced over the head of the formidable foe like a mother fucking gazelle, but it severed my legs with its pincers, my legs wiggled a little then slowly died on the floor. there was only one option left. i punched it in the fucking wiener causing it to orgle and eviscerate himself. a flute played from the skies and as a reward i am eating my pepper peanut flavored cookie to this day that had crumbled on my floor and disemboweled batches of trick or treaters with a scimitar that attempted to loot my booty. the music never stopped playing and the whole neighborhood died from sleep deprivation THE END.