AGI Stands for ‘Artificial Gooner Intelligence’

Another billion dollars for the sexy waifu machine.

Published 4 months ago in Funny

As the A.I. arms race intensifies, companies are scrambling to push their products to market.

Mark Zuckerberg has amassed a team of “super-intelligent engineers,” which is costing META nearly a billion dollars in salary alone, and recently bragged about its plan to build a data center the size of Manhattan. Google also announced its investment of $25 billion into creating A.I. data centers across the country.

Elon Musk’s, however, is focused on serving a different need: that of the gooner. xAI released its “AI Companion” feature for SuperGrok users this week, which is basically a Her-style companion bot that you can customize to wear lingerie.

Why does an AI need to be this, Mr. Musk?

What's the reasoning behind it?

I just wanna know.

How does this lead to AGI? pic.twitter.com/W9JlHP3OOx
— Poe's Law, Esq: Poe's Lawyer (@dyingscribe) July 14, 2025

I hate to break it to you, but “AGI” is bullshit. There will never be a truly conscious computer, only computers smart enough to convince humans they’re conscious — something smart people already know.