FIFA Reveals New World Cup Mascots, and America’s Really Sucks
Why do Canada and Mexico get to have the cool ones?
Published 2 months ago in Facepalm
In case you haven’t been following soccer news, the World Cup is going to be held in three different countries next year: Canada, the United States and Mexico. While the countries haven’t had the *best* relationship over the past year or so, there’s a chance that maybe, through sports, we’ll be able to fix everything.
Speaking of things we need to fix, FIFA recently debuted its new mascots for the event and, I’m sorry to say it, but we really drew the short straw here.
The official mascots for the 2026 FIFA World Cup are here
Which country's mascot is your favorite? pic.twitter.com/DdilYaF32J— FOX Soccer (@FOXSoccer) September 25, 2025
To start, there’s Canada, who are rolling in with the adorable Maple the Moose. From there, we have Mexico, who come in hot with the cool-looking Zayu the Jaguar.
What does the U.S. get? Some dumb bird called “Clutch,” who, while being a bald eagle, is so disproportionate and strange that it ends up looking like a bad DeviantArt commission, not a symbol for a FIFA host country.
According to FIFA, Clutch is supposed to represent “every culture, game and moment with boundless curiosity and optimism.” To me, he just represents a failure in graphic design.
Seriously, can we have another go at this, please?
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