Christians Think God Postponed the Rapture Until After the Epstein Files Are Released
If you’re reading this, you didn’t get raptured.
Published 2 months ago in Funny
It’s easy to say South African pastor Joshua Mhlakela was wrong after he claimed God spoke to him and foreshadowed the day of Christ’s return, but some Christians online aren’t satisfied with that reasoning.
According to the Daily Star, Christians are instead blaming the federal government for its refusal to release the Epstein files first, claiming God chose to postpone the rapture until after Epstein’s list of associates is made public, which is a hilarious pivot if true.
Society Wednesday morning after the evangelicals disappear in the Rapture Tuesday pic.twitter.com/HtuwVyHFbz
— Prof. Alma Holzhurt (@savage_prof) September 21, 2025
Personally, I don’t think we can definitively say the rapture didn’t happen. It just didn’t happen to any of us heathens.
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