Depicted above is a man who epitomizes the southern portion of the United States: myopic, astigmatic, imprudent ... basically any negative adjective that one can think of. 

If not blatantly obvious, the United States is currently entrapped in a conundrum in regards to various issues: illegals, drugs, old people, rap music, the economy, McDonalds ... the list is quite endless. That being said, take a look at the specifics: who or what exactly is instigating and perpetuating such issues? The southern portion of the United States, an area riddled with nothing but welfare recipients, beer chugging trailer trash, Saints fans, Walmart shoppers, McDonalds employees, morbidly obese pigs, and people of that ilk. 

Have you ever stumbled upon the movie "Idiocracy" starring that Wilson brother and some black woman? Of course you have - although the movie's intentions are clear, we must all collaborate and come to the realization that the "future" depicted is what the south is today. 



Oh yes, a false illusion devised by the clever geniuses in Hollywood - NOT. The city depicted is present day New Orleans, covered in trash, abandoned and poorly constructed skyscrapers, and pollution. Here's a fact: most southerners don't care about the environment since it is too "faggy" - ask a southerner what recycling is and he or she will be scratching his or her ass for minutes before spewing some moronic statement like, "uh, a Nascar car?" 



Ah yes - a typical Southerner, how lovely! Note the boor's appearance: draped in a Costco apron to prevent mustard stains from accumulating on his extra large shirt. Here's another fun fact: all southerners are fat. Try waltzing into Dallas and see if you can spot a well fit person ... it's impossible. Every street corner consists of a McDonalds, a Five Guys, a Burger King, and Pig Lard Box, and Heart Disease R' Us. Carrots are considered "queer" in Texas ... heck, most vegetables are frowned upon due to their low-fat content. Going on a diet in Texas is ILLEGAL as well as participating in extracurricular activities. 

Oh look, the southerners looked steamed, ready to one star this blog and leave "nasty" comments because southerners can talk the talk but can't walk the walk. Quite frankly, I can only hope for another Civil War, where the northerners would completely OBLITERATE the incompetent peasants that occupy the southern portion of the United States. This time around, however, the northerners would NOT spare you fools ... instead, you would be forced into camps and exterminated for good. The south has given the United States a bad reputation ... from George W. Bush to Vince Young ... the south is the REAL problem, not the economy or the president. I can guarantee you guys this: if the south was completely removed either by nuclear weapons or simply handing over the lands back to Mexico and the natives, the United States would flourish and regain its rightful position as being number one. 

GOOD DAY SOUTHERNERS - PACK YOUR BAGS, YOU PIGS. THE NORTH WILL ALWAYS BE BETTER ... NICKELBACK IS THE GREATEST BAND ALIVE, DEAL WITH IT.