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Silent gas emissions

A respectable old lady went to see her doctor. She told him, "Yesterday I had lunch with the Governor's wife, and while I was there I had three silent gas emissions. I was just mortified. Then, last night I met with the Ladies Dining Club and I had five silent gas emissions. It was more than I could bear! And since I have been here today I have had four silent gas emissions. Doctor, what can you do to help me?”

The doctor replied, “Well first of all, we are going to check your hearing.”
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