A Mother passing by her son's bedroom was astonished to see that
his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.
Then she saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Mom' With the worst premonition she opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Mom:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Dad and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is
so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her
piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she
is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Mom she's
pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer
in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We
share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really
hurt anyone. Wel be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the
other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the
meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Mom. I'm 15 and I
know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be
back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love,

Your Son Paul


P.S. Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at Dustin's house. I
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than
the report card that's in my center desk drawer.


I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.