15 Hilariously Over-Sexed Video Game Covers That Make No Sense
PocketEpiphany
Published
08/19/2022
in
ftw
Sex sells is the most basic idea in marketing. It's a basic math equation: boobies + horny guys = $$$
So it's no surprise this business approach has found a lot of success in video games. Before people play a game they gotta be attracted to the cover, so we scoured the internet to find the most spiciest, attractive game covers of all time.
Some of these titles are familiar, but hopefully a few are a little new for you. Check out the 15 most boner-inducing video game covers ever.
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1.
CatherineCatherine is a solid game, but this cover distills the psychological gameplay into something hilariously blunt: a man who just cannot escape a large pair of breasts.Not a bad problem to have though? -
2.
Pure PinballMost pinball games are boring, and that’s definitely the case with Pure Pinball.So to make up for it, the game features the different table themes on the cover in the form of sexy ladies engaging in some serious closet cosplay. -
3.
Lollipop Chainsaw Every now and then horny on main cover design works out. For example, the otherwise middle-of-the-road game Lollipop Chainsaw prominently features a sexy, midriff-baring character that became an instant icon (regardless of the quality of the title). -
4.
Venice Beach VolleyballWhat if you designed a video game cover for the worst kinds of sports fans? That’s the case with Venice Beach Volleyball, which seems to care more about boobs and butts than the titular ball. -
5.
Elvira: Mistress of the DarkIt’s almost cheating: after all, any game featuring Elvira is going to be pretty damn sexy. But putting the developer’s name right across her cleavage really pushes this one over the edge. -
6.
BayonettaWe get it: Bayonetta is already a pretty sexualized game and character. But this cover is hilariously blatant.Leather catsuit + thicc ass = countless gamers handing over their wallets. -
7.
BarbarianYou know a cover is sexy when it makes concerned parents freak out. That’s the case with Barbarian: The Ultimate Warrior.It’s a pretty basic hack and slash game but the cover caused countless people in Britain to denounce is as pornographic and offensive. -
8.
Vampire the Masquerade: BloodlinesGotta give credit to this cover for its horniness in a very specific way.Rather than focusing on a nubile human victim, the cover lingers on a sexy female vamp who is presumably about to snack on her next victim. Now that's progress. -
9.
Dead or Alive Extreme 3When it comes to game covers, there is “sexy” and there is “unapologetically horny.” Dead or Alive Extreme 3 falls into the second category.The cover is pure cheesecake and the game itself will make you want to turn off the TV when someone walks in the room. -
10.
mobygamesLula: Sexy EmpireAs far as the rare adults only genre of games goes, Lula: Sexy Empire isn’t half bad.But the cover, featuring the titular Lula spilling out of her clothes, is the most wonderful trash. She got basketball boobies for sure. -
11.
SudekiSudeki is a pretty forgettable action RPG. Maybe that’s why the cover is pretty much “Advanced Double D’s.” But what did you expect from a developer named Climax? -
12.
VixenVixen is another game that managed to upset the British. Why?Because the cover featured a scantily-clad model of course. We have a feeling this cover helped many young boys discover the “Hand of the Lost” too. -
13.
X-Man No, there are no mutants here. But this adult game cover was all about truth in advertising. It features a scantily-clad woman with the titular character holding his junk from exploding.He looks so distracted that he might not notice when that mouth eats his ass. But maybe he’s into that sort of thing. -
14.
SilverfallHow do you make a boring RPG look good? With Silverfall, the answer is simple: put your cutest supporting character on the cover and take away most of her clothes.Maybe everyone else is too scared to tell the proud elf she should put on the rest of her clothes? -
15.
Advanced D&D: The Dark Queen of KrynnThe hottest video game covers run right past "that looks sexy” and into “that’s my new fetish.” For example, this Dungeons and Dragons game features a mostly naked leather mommy tormenting a dude who is all tied up. If you played this game when it came out you're probably on the fifth edition of some very specific kinks.
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CatherineCatherine is a solid game, but this cover distills the psychological gameplay into something hilariously blunt: a man who just cannot escape a large pair of breasts.Not a bad problem to have though?
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